20 signs that He’s The One.

Have you ever wondered if the person you’re with is actually The One? Is he your Soulmate?

In this post, I will explore all the signs that he’s “The One” and you will be able to identify if you have indeed met your soulmate.

Why is it so important to consider whether he’s your soul mate?

Meeting the right person to go through your life with is not everyone’s luck. Many people might think they have met “The One” and end up in painful (and expensive) divorce. And the worst-case scenario is when the children get involved in the whole mess of a divorce or a split.

Why not just taking the step back and evaluate the relationship at the very beginning before going through with the marriage and kids.

This will help you to ensure that you are not investing your time and feelings into a relationship that will most likely end up unsuccessful.

If you find that vast majority of the points below your partner meets, you should rest assured you have indeed found “The One”.

Related post:

18 Secrets to a Happy & Healthy Marriage.

I have met my soulmate and only 3 months into our relationship we were in the registry picking the first available date. 8 months into our relationship we were married. That was 12 years ago. We have 3 kids and are still very much in love and happy with each other.

Sometimes love comes unexpectantly and that is the whole beauty of it. But it is easy to fall into a trap of being in a “new relationship bubble” and then when the bubble bursts, we have already gone too far to back off, so we carry on until we can’t do it any longer. That is why it is so important to look out for the signs and when you notice your partner is showing many of them, you can let yourself enjoy the relationship.

Here are the 20 signs that he’s The One:

This is not in any particular order.

Sometimes those little signs might just be the ones that would convince you of your choice.

 

1. He’s on the same page

This is so important when you meet somebody and he’s just on the same page as you. He wants the same in life at the same time as you.

When I met my husband we were both looking for a life partner and both wanted to get married and have children right away. It was just naturally falling into place as we were on the same page.

If your partner is still a party animal, does not think of having a family, and you are so ready for it all, that’s not to say he won’t meet you there one day, but ensure you know how long you would need to wait and if you want to wait that long.

 

2. He brings the best in you

You might have some habits or some flows that because your partner is seeing the best in you, you would want to improve.

Like my husband used to smoke, and I asked him if he could give up which he did.

I used to believe very little in myself but my husband always saw the potential and used to encourage me to push for my dreams.

If you have met someone that quite the opposite gets you to join the smokers club or drink more or start doing something you would not approve for your kids to do, put a stop to it before it’s too late.

 

3. You are both attracted to each other (not only physically)

The law of attraction is a fascinating topic and one I enjoy exploring in books or various articles. Here is an interesting article if you wanted to explore the topic.

It’s not just physical attraction that I am talking about. You like each other’s way of thinking, you like each other’s souls and hearts. Every single thing in the person attracts you. That is more powerful than a physical attraction alone and will last much longer as remember, one day we will all grow old and wrinkly and physically might not be as attractive as now. Hence the inner beauty is much more important.

 

4. He’s family orientated

In the UK we have the highest rate of women over 40 not having children. This would suggest that perhaps not every one of us is cut out for it and being in the country where respects women’s right most equally the career take over and the natural instincts take latter place.

However, if you are in the group of woman that do look for a man to have a family with, this is an important point to look out for.

He will be talking about the kids in the near future, family life and be very much involved in the life of his own family. He would also be good with kids. I have seen man however who never really been too fussed about kids until they had their own and they’ve gone head over hills crazy about them, so that’s not a rule and don’t scrap a man just because he is not naturally warmed to them.

Do look out for the family values and how he perceives the family life.

 

5. You are his priority

Not he’s friends, not he’s toys (cars, games, gym) but YOU.

You must know that when you need him he will be there for you.

That’s not to say he’s not supposed to have friends or hobbies, but you should be the one that is the most important and he will drop everything if you needed him. Also, that’s not to say that when you brake your nail he should drop everything to run to you. It should be about the balance and you would feel if you are indeed his priority.

 

6. His parents are still together

This is not really a must as obviously everyone comes from a different background and not everyone has a luck to have a lovely caring family. But the statistics show that children are more likely to replicate parent’s mistakes in their own relationships. So just be wary that if your partner had a challenging childhood and he’s parents had divorced or separated, the chances are your relationship might get affected by the traumas of his childhood.

My husband comes from a divorced family and this has made him want to work even harder to ensure we are forever to be a one. So it could turn either way, it’s just good to keep in mind.

 

7. He show’s off about you

I remember when my husband used to introduce me to his friend as his Mrs and brag about me to everyone (he still does).

I think this shows how much he adores and appreciates me. It’s an important sign to look out for and you should feel the same about him.

You want to tell everyone you have met this lovely guy that is so smart, takes you to nice dates, is so romantic. You feel like you want to shout out to the world how happy you are.

After 13 years of being together, I still have this feeling!

 

8. He pushes you to achieve the best as he knows your capabilities

My husband has always been pushing me to finish my university, then to finish my qualifications. He is always very supportive in helping with kids and house chores when I am busy working, blogging or when I was studying.

This is the sign you want to look for. You want to make sure that when you fell a little down, or you have failed in something, he picks you up, motivates you and pushes you to go forward. It’s hard to motivate yourself and having a partner that is your cheerleader will make a big difference.

 

9. He compliments you

You must have heard when people say- “my other half” when referring to their partners?

There is a story I’ve heard (not quite sure where)- about a human being created as a person with 4 arms, 4 legs and 2 heads. One day God decided to separate him in half. So the person had only 2 arms, 2 legs and 1 head. Ever since this person was forever looking to find his second half and only once it found one it was truly happy, content and complete.

It really makes sense that we are looking for the other half to complete us. And when you have that feeling you have found your other had, you will feel complete and will no longer be looking for anyone else.

So when you feel like your partner completes you, that is the feeling I am talking about.

Together you make ONE!

 

10. He tells and/or shows you he’s feelings

Not everyone finds easy to talk about their feelings but everyone can express them (unless they have some underlying issues).

When you meet a guy that struggles to express their positive feelings like love but finds easy to show anger, you know he’s feelings for you are not Love. Run, if you can!

If you find a guy that with either his touch, words, gestures or actions shows you the love, that is when you know he genuinely loves you.

 

11. He’s never abusive (mentally or physically)

As soon as you see one of the following in the guy you’re dating, your alarm should start ringing:

• swearing at you/ others
• throwing things in anger
• becoming aggressive after a few drinks
• hitting you
• hitting others
• aggressive in nature
• gets angry with little triggers
• is very argumentative

In general, if those traits show early in the relationship, there’s a high chance of it going even worse as the relationship progresses.

The domestic abuse is one of the most common reasons for divorces but the problem is that many people get stuck in such toxic relationships not knowing how to get out. If your partner is abusive that’s the sign He’s NOT The One.

I sympathise with anyone that has been a victim and want to point that not only women are victims of domestic abuse. Men too suffer from it.

This is why it’s so important to run away from such a relationship as soon as you notice the above. Your partner should show you nothing else but respect! The arguments will happen, but it all should be respectful and within the boundaries.

If you are in the abusive relationship and are seeking help please go to Womans’ Aid website where you can either chatt, call or write in forum where other victims support each other. 

 

12. He knows the boundaries and does not cross them

This is in relation to the opposite gender.

When you are with a man that looks at other woman and comments on their beauty, it’s not a nice feeling also not a good sign. It would hurt your feelings and lower your self-confidence.

I also don’t believe in a friendship between opposite genders and both me and my husband do not have best friends (of the opposite sex) that we bring home or go out to spend time with. If this is a mutual friend that you have met during the relationship and you both have a friendship with them that is different although make sure you are comfortable with it.

I believe in one thing- Always put yourself in the other’s person shoes. Look from their perspective and evaluate what would it feel like.

It does have the element of trust here but remember- the trust is there until it’s lost. Once lost it’s hard to rebuild it.

 

13. He makes you laugh

If you are to spend the rest of your lives together, wouldn’t it be nice to have a laugh rather than be glum or miserable?

This has an element of compatibility as you might find the jokes of one person not funny at all, whereas someone else might find them hilarious. So if you both make each other laugh and understand each other’s jokes you are most likely compatible and will find easy to get on with each other.

 

14. He’s polite and kind to everyone

I dislike arrogant people. I think that it’s a very nasty trail and I steer away from such people.

I am always trying my best to be polite and expect the same from others. It gets you so much further in life in any kind of relationship.

Kindness does not cost anything and yet so many people just don’t care about other’s feelings and get nasty especially online where they are not face-to-face with their victims.

If you meet such a person whether that’s your potential partner or just a friend, steer away from them as they don’t deserve kindness from you. They either need to learn a lesson or will forever stay alone and get eaten by their own nastiness.

R.I.P. to so many beautiful people that have taken their own life due to the trolls spreading their negativities.

BE KIND !

 

15. He treats you well

At the beginning of a relationship, your partner is likely to take you to nice dates, shower you with gifts and treat you like a princess. This should continue and he should always be treating you like a princess. Maybe not as intense as you grow older together, especially if you are saving up for a house or a nice holidays.

When you go through many years together and have children and get so busy with life, you might no longer be able to go out for dates, but he should still treat you well. He still opens the door for you, is kind, helps out, makes you tea, gives you a massage or whatever you like (in the reasonable limits – not saying he should buy you diamond ring for each birthday if you are not doing well financially). Those little gestures will show you he still cares and should continue forever. And this should be mutual!

 

16. He’s not controlling

In the relationship is all about trust. If there is no trust the jealousy will kick in and it can turn ugly. Starting from the checking of the phone for who you message or call, though to asking where you going, whom with and what time you’ll be back. Calling you many times when you’re out with friends. Through to stopping you to go out altogether. That’s not a healthy relationship and it’s a sign that this man is controlling you. He is the one that has issues most likely hence is not trusting you.

 

If you really believe in this relationship but your partner is starting to control you, it’s time for a serious talk as you need to establish why is he acting like this. If he does not want to talk or turns this around blaming you, you know where the door is… Run!

 

17. He never brings you down

Is your partner criticising you?

Does he do it often?

How does this make you feel?

Do you get upset, angry or does it make you want to do things better?

Depending on what he criticises you on, this might trigger different feelings.

If this is to do with your looks, not only you will get sad, you will also lose some self- esteem.

If it’s your cooking skills that he’s criticising, you will feel angry and might feel like never cooking again. Whatever it is- it’s sure to bring you down.

This point links a little with the point 11 above although is not as bad and can be eliminated by a discussion about the feelings.

Explain how it makes you feel when he talks down to you and that it’s not helping in improving the situations.

If he cares enough, he should understand and stop doing so.

 

18. He confines in you

Your partner should treat you like his best friend whom he confines in his secrets and you should feel the same about your partner.

That’s the whole point of the partnership– you should be there for each other and confide in each other every time you go through a struggle. It should feel like a natural thing to speak to you if he wants to tell you things others shouldn’t know about.

 

19. He respects you

Above all your partner must respect you. He must respect your views, your ideas, your opinions your religious believes and You as a person.

Do not accept the lack of respect from anyone.

20. He loves you

Most importantly:

If the guy does not love you and is scared to ever admit to it, what’s the chance he will ever commit to a long-term relationship.

So if you happen to find one that is struggling to say those 3 words- I Love You- it will probably never going to happen.

Do yourself a favour- don’t waste your time and walk away… Life’s too short to waste it on some idiots…

 

Conclusion

I hope the above points have helped you to identify all the signs that he’s The One.

You must remember that If you have met the right person it will feel right. It feels like you have found your other half. And it will feel “At Home”.

At the beginning of my relationship, I used to say to my husband that it was a Destiny that we have met. He had a tattoo of a Scorpio on his arm that he got done in the same tattoo studio that I had my little dolphin done before we even knew each other. Guess what star sign I am- Yup! A Scorpio! And he is a Capricorn in case you ask! So it was my definite sign that he’s The One.

Have you found your Mr Right?

What sign that he’s The One have you identified?

I would love to hear from you.

 

Thanks for reading!